Peace in the Family---My High Touch-Low Tech Vacation

"The cable guy will be here between 2 & 4," my daughter announced at breakfast.

What?  What was wrong with the cable?  The teens were texting away and the adults were checking their work e-mail throughout the stay.  There was some problem with our digital life?

The TV, I finally realized, the TV was never on.  No cooking shows, no early morning news blaring away while I stumbled around to find a coffee mug--just folks talking and laughing and the sounds of dogs play-fighting and yipping to go outside.  So semi-peaceful.

The nice cable guy arrived during his appointed window and patiently healed and updated the TVs stuck up in the corners of several rooms.  Quite the professional, he spoke only when needed and held very still while he worked through the update menu, while we all walked back and forth past him to access the pool, the dog run, the laundry, the beach coolers...I happened to be in one room with him for quite a long time, keeping the dogs from biting his pants legs, when the willowly teen girls returned from their morning bake on the sand.  I paused my chatter 'cause I knew he would be slightly distracted, then silently chuckled to myself when I realized that his working in and around homes at the Outer Banks probably afforded him several gorgeous views each day.

Thankfully, all the house guests were too busy to watch any TV later that day or even in the evening.  The intense heat was bearable only in the early morning and at dusk so we were all outside, swimming or walking the dogs, the very hours when some folks normally watch their favorite shows.  No Jeopardy, no Antiques Roadshow, no theatrical news accented by plunging cleavage.  Ahhhhh.

That was vacation.  Now I'm home and back indagroove of everyday life.  When you walk down to the kitchen to fix your humble, non-vacay breakfast do you sometimes dread the onslaught of accumulated emotion from a loved one who uses their early rising hours to pour over cable news or their favorite, inflammatory website?  If so, here are some tips I developed to help me stay on an even keel in the mornings, when my brain is still a little foggy from dreams and unable to recall my resolve to avoid kitchen counter-arguments.  Thankfully, my loved one listened to me when I asked for no tirades in the morning and they are now few in number.  As he has always said, "If you want me to do something just tell me, don't make me guess what you want."  Excellent advice, eh?

Staying on an Even Keel in the Mornings

Prep mentally before entering kitchen or perhaps when waking up.  Review the following steps for keeping calm:

• Avoid looking at print material left in view--computer news print-outs or newspaper clippings.
• Rehearse neutral responses to comments ("Wow" "Interesting" "That's something")
• Recall neutral topics of mutual interest to use for changing the subject (dogs, horses, business)
• Re-direct own thoughts to enjoyable subjects if caught in non-stoppable barrage of information.

Oh, and here's the cutest thing I heard during our 2.5 days at the beach.  One family member was extolling the virtues of her favorite news shows and how-in-the-world-could-anyone-think-differently?  I slightly teased about my husband's agreement with her source of information and how he and I occasionally needled each other about my listening to the local public radio station for the news.

When the woman's husband walked past me later to put his dishes in the sink, empty the trash, keep the grand kids busy outside and continue to be helpful in any way he could he quietly said to me, "I used to listen to NPR every morning on my long commute to work."

The secrets we keep to keep peace in the family.